Month: December 2012

The Twelve Days of Judgment Challenge

A few weeks ago, my friend Tracey over at The Ambiguous Fairy Tale asked me to be a guest-blogger for her blog.  Today, in the first-ever post by a guest-blogger on Judged by Jenn, she is returning the favor — and issuing a challenge.  (I can’t wait to tackle this one!)  Clearly, Tracey and I are cut from the same cloth, for she knows my holiday mantra: ’tis the season to judge — and she has provided me with much motivation to do so, as you will see below.  Further evidence?  She recently wrote a wickedly funny post about those blasted Elf on a Shelf things that, I swear, perfectly echoed my thoughts on the little &@$%@#&$.  (What’s in the Box?)

Go on, check out Tracey’s challenge to me, and when you’re finished, go check out her blog, The Ambiguous Fairy Tale.  After all, everyone loves a Fairy Tale.

The Twelve Days of Judgment Challenge

There are 2 things I know well about my friend Jenn:

1. She knows a sartorial faux pas when she sees one.
2. She is the best damn surreptitious photographer I’ve ever known.

So I thought it would be entertaining to put Jenn’s skills to the test….a scavenger hunt of judgment, if you will.

Here’s how this is going to work:

Jenn has 12 days to snap surreptitous photos of the fashion fiascos listed below. You, Jenn’s readers, may help. If you come across any of the following, drop Jenn an email including the photo. Here is the catch:   if Jenn can’t come up with proof of each item on the list within the twelve days, she has to meet me for lunch wearing any combination of the ensembles of my choosing. If she does meet the challenge, lunch is on me.   Fair enough?

Here we go:

1. Pajamas bottoms and a cartoon t-shirt, in public (you get a bonus point if the pants have cartoon characters, too.)

2. Any combination of too much camo (We live in AR. How hard can this be?)

3. Leggings in need of a tunic top. (Nuff said)

4. Size-inappropriate pants.

5. Underwear issues (think whale tail, pants of the ground, panty lines)

6. Oops! I forgot my bra today! (This is a no brainer. Have you BEEN to Walmart?)

7. Too. Much. Sparkle. (It’s the holidays; this should be EASY)

8. Tacky Christmas sweater (Had to)

9. Crocs and socks. (Again, thank goodness for Walmart, the god of endless blog fodder)

10. Eyeshadow….LOTS of eyeshadow.

11. Summer clothes, winter weather.

12. Clothes and/or jewelry that light up. (Because nothing says Happy Holidays like flashing earrings. Sorry, Mom)

Game on, Jenn.  Game on.
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A Few Words About Thankfulness

Before we get too deep into December, I wanted to say a few words about November & thankfulness.

Unlike many of my Facebook friends and acquaintances, I did not spend the days of November enumerating the the blessings in my life or the things for which I am thankful. Of course I am thankful for my friends, my family (the one I was born into and the one I have dated into the last 3.5 years), the people I love, my health, my fur-babies, the fact that I am employed, etcetera. Why didn’t I spend the month of November sharing with the masses 30 things for which I am grateful? Because the masses don’t give a rat’s rear about my gratitude any more than I give one about theirs.

I’m sorry, was that harsh? Too bad.

I spend an inordinate amount of time rolling my eyes at posts on Facebook as it is. Some people apparently thrive on drama and attention-seeking behavior. Why do I read their chatter? Look, I have as hard a time looking away from a train wreck as the next person. On the other hand, I don’t care so much to have everyone I know up in every aspect of my life. November was a month that increased the eye-rolling exponentially. Seriously. It is a wonder I could even see where I was going for much of the month since my eyes spent so much more time rolled into the back of my head than looking forward.

I’m not saying don’t be thankful for the good things in your life, but seriously? When you are posting about absolutely ludicrous things — free powerball tickets? Online Black Friday shopping? Leftover Halloween Candy? Friday? That the season of cheesy Christmas sweaters has arrived??? — perhaps it’s time to stop posting. You, my friend, have effectively reached the bottom of the barrel. Please stop scraping.

I am not saying I don’t appreciate a cup of coffee from Starbucks, or that I don’t rejoice when the number on my scale decreases by a few pounds (or when the weight on the barbell I’m lifting increases by a few pounds), or that I am not happy as a little dead pig lying in the sunshine when I liberate my feet from a pair of particularly uncomfortable shoes at the end of a long day in court. And honestly, I am not saying I am not somewhat self-centered, shallow and superficial. But there is enough going on below the surface that I don’t think those are the sorts if things the pilgrims sat around expressing gratitude for, nor do I think those are the “blessings” Thanksgiving is supposed to be about.

That’s just my opinion. (And I am “thankful” that I have both a platform & the ability to share it.)

With that said, I am extra thankful that November is over and I don’t have to read “Thirty Days of Gratitude” posts again for another year.